How do you politely tell somebody what you REALLY think they should do with their opinion?

So apparently certain people have a HUGE issue with me not changing my daughter IMMEDIATELY even though I had no wipes, no warm water, and no heat even if I wanted to warm up some cold water. I am officially the worst mother in the world because I let my daughter stay in her poopy diaper for an extra 30 minutes until daddy got home with the wipes. Guess I should have  rinsed her down with cold water even though there was no heat in my apartment. What's risking getting a cold compared to a poopy diaper?!?!?! Guess I could have used the lysol wipes, but I'd rather save them for sanitizing the kitchen counter. Oops...better not joke about that in case somebody flips their shit.

Little PSA...don't use lysol wipes to clean your child's skin...it's bad.

Wonder how they would react to know that if she poops in her sleep...I don't wake her up to change her. *gasp* I can hear CPS pulling up to my door right now.

People also think it's SO terrible that I call my daughter Fatty McNoFriends...actually a friend said she's her friend so I have to change it to Fatty McOneFriend. Just in case that's not bad enough...I also call her...Fat Little Monster, Fat Fat Fattybadatty, Chunky Monkey, Smelly Kid, Gross Little Human Being (I reserve that one for when she's eating boogers or in the case of an earlier post...her poop), My Little Bastard, and her dad has called her Little Shitty pretty much since she was born. Pretty sure every doctor said it's not so much the words your saying as the tone of voice you're saying it in anyway. Just in case she magically understands what I'm saying though...I better start saving up to pay for her therapy...she's gonna need A LOT of it. I should probably make my roommate, friends, and sisters contribute to it too. Everybody thinks her fat nicknames are funny, one friend took the time to explain what a pearl necklace is to her (not the expensive kind), and my roommate is more attached to the word fuck than anybody else I know & laughs at her when I punish her. Combine all that with the fact that her last name is completely made up, that daddy thought the movie Precious was funny (it's about abuse & rape...I really have no explanation), why there are no pictures of her father with her as a baby, the quite possibly emotionally abusive relationship I have with my sisters (we really do love each other), and then there is the inevitable exposure to my mother who happens to be a special kind of special...she is going to make some therapist VEEEEERY wealthy. I am making a minor effort to spare her psyche...I regularly check Google to make sure pictures of mommy before she was mommy are still safely tucked away on unknown cameras. And...she'll be spanked. Ohhhh the horrors!!!

Seriously though people...so long as my daughter is happy, healthy, well fed (obviously), clothed, *usually* clean, and certainly loved, I'm gonna have to say I'm a damn good mother and if you think you have the right to tell me I'm a bad mother (especially if you don't have children of your own), I'll go ahead & tell you to go fuck yourself. Although I will say it nicely and put please on the end because I want my Little Fat Fat Fatty Badatty McNoFriends to have good manners.